Leftbrain Kansas has obtained a draft press release from the office St. Mary's Republican Richard Carlson which reads as follows.
TOPEKA -- A recent study by prominent Kansas legislators has concluded that regulatory uncertainty created by Kansas Department of Health and Environment's Rod Bremby's decision to reject the Holcomb power plant expansion may have played a role in the extinction of the dionsaurs.
Rep. Larry Powell, top lackey for legislative psuedo-science expert Melvin Neufeld, said that the dinosaurs were unable to sustain life in an environment where they just didn't know how much carbon they were going to be able to produce.
"They know that when they breathe, they're creating so much carbon that it was only a matter of time before Secretary Bremby denied their air quality permit," Powell said. "Even though it's good for the corn, the uncertainty was just too much for them, and they eventually died off. We can thank the Sebelius administration. Kathleen Sebelius killed the dinosaurs."
We are unclear as to why this press release was never sent out. As far as we can tell, it's just as believable as the one they actually did send out. In the second release, Carlson claims that Bremby's decision led to Hyperion Resources' decision to build an oil refinery in South Dakota instead of Kansas.
Nevermind the fact that the company had already set up an office in the South Dakota city that was in contention.
Nevermind the fact that only Elk City, South Dakota is listed on their web site as a potential location.
Ignore the fact that they had already begun the process of acquiring land and getting it zoned all long before Secretary Bremby's decision.
It was none of these factors that caused them to choose South Dakota, it was all because Secretary Bremby invokes fear in their hearts.
He is the biggest bad ass on the block and they just didn't want any of it.
Just like the dinosaurs.